Love, Sex and Relationships: The “Secret” behind it all! – Exclusive Interview with Dating Coach and Human Dynamics Expert Harvey Hooke – Episode 4

Friendzoned. Heartbroken. Rejected. Hurt. I lived a great part of my life like that. Stuck in a series of unfulfilling relationships, where I was not given the love and understanding that I wanted. Chasing after girls. And getting nothing out of it. Basing my fragile confidence and attractiveness based on the results of those meaningless pursuits.

At the time, I did not understand the art of attracting women because I was too busy chasing them. And when I got rejected or hurt: I blamed myself. I thought that there was something wrong with me: that I was not good enough, attractive enough and that I was being “too nice” and etc. And like many guys, I was told things like “Sami, you are just too nice.”, “I only see you as a friend.” and the list goes on and on and on. Can you relate?

Experiences like high school and university only validated those ideas for me and I turned from super nice guy to super jerk. It seemed like girls always went after the guy that treated them like shit. So that’s what I began doing and results started to come in. How did that song go? “Nice guys finish last, that’s why I’ll treat you like trash.”? I look back on that and laugh, but it worked at the time for reasons I understand only know. Continue reading to find out why!

You need to treat girls badly for them to be attracted to you? Nonsense.

But at some point, it made a lot of sense. I always saw the jerk with the super kind girl. The so-called “nice” guy is not in the picture at all. The nice guy is friendzoned and rejected left and right, for what seems like his kindness. However, that is not true. He is not rejected for being kind.

Do women like being treated badly? Of course, not. No stable and sane human being would tolerate that behavior. But women like to be challenged (that’s what flirting is after all) and know that they are with a mentally strong man that is sure of himself and knows what he is doing. The jerk gives off that vibe, even though all he is doing in reality is masking his own worthlessness and self-doubt with his ego.

Broken people attract broken people. The nice girl is with the jerk, because on some level she feels that she deserves that type of abusive treatment and that she is not good enough for someone better. So these two broken people attract one another, while confused and bitter Mr. Friendzone does not have his priorities straight. He chases women and ends up scaring them away instead. He bases his self-worth on someone else and then scratches his head in frustration, when he doesn’t get the girl, while the jerk does.

What do you think this means?

A post shared by Hi! I'm Harvey Hooke 🙂 (@gethimhooked) on

I was Mr. Friendzone.. until I decided to stop chasing after women and actually work on becoming the best version of myself possible. At the time, I had gotten out of a really meaningless relationship, where my feelings were not given much consideration nor importance. So I decided to end it and lay off chasing women for a while and focus on myself instead.

I started working out more, reading more and really pushing myself out of my self-imposed comfort zone (I CLIMBED FRIGGIN’ KILIMANJARO!) That’s when things really began to change and I attracted the people and relationships that I really grew from. Low-quality people began to leave my life and I realized that I didn’t have to change my personality or who I am for other people. And if I did have to change for those people, then they were not worth my time, my body, nor my attention.

And this is exactly what I enjoyed so much about my call with Dating Expert Harvey Hooke. I thought we would talk about love, sex and relationships, but we never talked about any of that! We ended up talking about how to become the most authentic and awesome version of yourself. How to really connect with yourself and change your limited and negative perception that you have of yourself to become the most attractive person in the room. And that is the key to attracting people!

Check out Samotivation Podcast, Episode 4 with Dating Coach Harvey Hooke! I am sure that you will enjoy it (warning there are lots of F-bombs being thrown left and right. If you are not comfortable with that, give it a miss.)

How a “Liability” Became an “Asset” – Mohamed Al Balushi – SP003-Samotivation Podcast Episode 3

For the very first time, I did a LIVE Samotivation Video Podcast on Instagram with my dear friend, Mohamed Al Balushi!
Mohamed was judged and mocked for being 132kg and overweight at the gym. He failed 5 courses and was told that he was a “LIABILITY to the image of the Petroleum Engineering program” at Texas A&M University at Qatar.

All the odds were against him. Yet, he proved everyone wrong. He lost 56kg and is now at a healthy weight of 76kgs, fit, healthy, successful and ambitious and graduating in just a few weeks time with a Petroleum Engineering degree from Texas A&M University at Qatar!
Guess he wasn’t a liability after all!

Samotivation Podcast – Episode 3 – How a Liability Became an Asset. This was the first time, I made the podcast live, uncut and on video and I am proud to have done so with Mohamed Al Balushi. Congratulations and best of luck with your journey my brother!

“Your comfort zone has been lying to you your entire life!” Exclusive Interview with Karate Master Iain Abernethy – Episode 2

The land of unlimited opportunity is not a country or geographical region.

The land of unlimited opportunity does not require a visa.

The land of unlimited opportunity does not need a plane ticket.


It is much closer than you think.

The question is…

Do YOU have what it takes to get there?

Today’s guest on the show, Karate Master and Author of Mental Strength: Condition Your Mind, Achieve Your Goals, Sensei Iain Abernethy (the BIG BUFF Scottish dude with the charming smile on the top pic above!) will show you exactly where that land is and how you can get there!


The land of unlimited opportunity is RIGHT THERE in your face.  EVERY.  SINGLE. DAY.

It looks you square in the eye. Whispering tales of success, glory, happiness, health, confidence and fulfillment into your ear.

Only.. you refuse to listen. You tell the voice to keep quiet. Shut up.

Any time, it tries to take you by the hand and lead you to a better life, you cross your arms and ignore the hand it extends to you.

I don’t want to move to this land. I am perfectly fine where I am. I don’t want to get up.

Where is this land and how do I get there, you ask?

All you have to do is just take a few steps outside your comfort zone.

This week’s episode is about the comfort zone and how the life of your dreams is only a few steps outside of it.

But let me tell you something, first.

You comfort zone has been lying to you your entire life.. instilling you with fear, doubt and insecurity.

You thought politicians were thieves, huh?!

I hate to burst your bubble… but your comfort zone is the biggest liar out there.

Your comfort zone is a LIAR.  The BIGGEST LIAR OUT THERE. Bigger than any politician or thief (very often it’s the same thing 😀 )

Now, let me tell you a secret…

You can use the lies your comfort zone tells you to bring you closer to your goals…


Getting out of the comfort zone will bring you the life and confidence you desire. Guaranteed.

On today’s show, we are joined by Karate Master and author of “Mental Strength” Sensei Iain Abernethy, who will show you EXACTLY how to do that.

To live the life of your dreams, you are going to need a lot of mental strength. If you want to develop the mental strength you need to reach new heights in your life, then Sensei Iain Abernethy’s book, Mental Strength is THE book for you!

Just click the picture below to get the book!

Make sure to like Sensei Iain Abernethy on Facebook and be sure to visit his website!

New Year. New Beginnings. – Episode 1 – SP001

2018 has just begun! And if you are like everyone else, you are busy away making a long list of New Year’s resolutions for the upcoming year.

But we both know that THIS YEAR (just like every other year) you will not keep the promises you made to yourself.

THIS New Year’s, you will look at your list from last year and realize that the ONLY thing you actually succeeded in is making a long list of promises that you did not keep… to YOURSELF.

A depressing and pessimistic picture. Isn’t it?

But it doesn’t have to be this way.

No. I am not trying to ruin your festive holiday atmosphere, or the spectacular feasts and the clicking of champagne glasses. Neither am I trying to put out the flicker of hope and optimism in your eyes as you embark on a new journey this 2018.

Carry on with your feasts and champagne and optimism.

I want you to think and reflect on your own life and what direction you are taking it in.

I want to take you out of this cycle of constant writing (and rewriting) of resolutions that you tell yourself you will keep, but never do.

Isn’t it time to make a change in your life?


ONE that goes beyond the first TWO weeks of January!?

But more importantly, did you REALLY have to wait an entire 12 MONTHS to assess yourself and your progress?


DID YOU KNOW THAT only 9% of us will actually achieve their New Year’s Resolutions!? According to a study of the Statistic Brain Institute, 91% of resolutioners will fail on their resolutions this upcoming year, while ONLY 9% will be successful.

(Side note: Yes, I know Statistic Brain Institute is a very weird name, but these guys are legit!)

Anyway. Back to the point.




百分之九? (This is 9% in Chinese, apparently. Thank you, Google. It also looks like my facial expression when I read this study!)

Nueve por ciento!? (I don’t speak burrito. Feliz navidad. Prospero año y felicidad.) 😉

!تسعة في المئة؟ (In case you wanna make that Ayrab money this year.)

ДЕВЕТ ПРОЦЕНТА? (I know you can’t read Bulgarian, but by now you get the point.)

Different languages, different cultures, different countries, different food (mmmm FOOD!)…. yet they all have ONE thing in common.

They ALL come together on Dec. 31st full of hope, optimism, massive feasts and….

the realization that they are nowhere closer to their goals at end the of the year, than they were at the beginning of the year.

I used be like that.

Every year, I would make a long list of promises and resolutions that I would never keep.

Until one New Year’s eve, when I got fed up of it.

Fed up with being afraid.

Fed up with being a victim to circumstance.

Fed up with regretting missed opportunities.

Fed up with believing that I would never be fit, successful, desirable, loved or rich.

And that was the moment where everything changed.

December 22nd, 2014. I will not forget that day. (And how could I.. that is my birthday after all 😀 )

I remember being in tears most of the time.

Sitting on the coach, intently looking at the TV screen, I watched as I grew from a tiny baby into a tall young man.

I watched in amazement, as I saw the baby take its first steps…

I then watched as the baby (now a 3 year old unruly boy) ran wild in all directions across a theme park (with his mother chasing after him, of course. Good times :D)

On the screen then appeared, an awkward, insecure and self-conscious teenager during his primary school years, followed by the smiling high school valedictorian, all suited up and ready and eager to start the next phase of his life.

And now I was in my second year of university studies.

“Where on earth did all that time go?” – I thought to myself, as heavy, regretful, bitter tears began rolling down my face.

Fast-forward to New Years 2014 a few days later.

Everything happened so quickly.

19 YEARS of my life had passed by!? And what had I achieved in that time?


Absolutely nothing.

I was not satisfied with my body, my crappy relationship, my grades, my life, but mostly myself.

I was unhappy with myself.

There were so many things that I talked myself out of… even before I tried.

So many missed opportunities and so much regret over what I didn’t do.

So many should have/would have/could haves.

I realized how many opportunities I let pass me by because of fear, hesitation and insecurity.

I felt like a failure.

Through the tears, I vowed to NEVER. EVER. feel like that again.

I promised myself that next year, I would look back on the year that passed and actually be proud of it, as opposed to being regretful, sorry and sad.

Everything that scared me, I would do.

That was a promise.

A promise I still keep to myself 4 years later.

And that is where the real journey began.

May this year be the one where YOUR journey begins!

Listen to today’s VERY FIRST Samotivation Podcast episode to figure out how you TOO can take your resolutions from a SHEET OF PAPER to REALITY!

P.S: Nothing is more fitting to describe that New Year’s than the video below.
Harry Potter fans enjoy!